Typically, co-parenting appears like navigating the journey of raising your kids with your ex. In reality, it’s more about keeping the peace, overlooking the red flags and despite every odds, leaving in every effort to raise a happy kid.
However, parenting with someone with whom you’re no longer emotionally involved can be overwhelming. But does it need to feel like walking on eggshells every time?
No, here’s good news for you. It is possible to have a healthy and effective co-parenting relationship even with someone you once had some (or more) heated debates with.
7 Helpful Parenting Tips You Must Know
Read below to find some of the most effective co-parenting tips to help you explore this not-so-weird parenting journey.
It’s Your Child
The ultimate goal of co-parenting is not to prove yourself as a W or that you’re a superior parent. Instead, the real goal is to raise a happy and healthy child who gets the love of both parents.
Sarcastically, you and your ex are still on the same team—your child, even if your outfits are different. Overall, you must focus on whatever is best for your child and showing that they’re your priority.
Keep The Conversation Short and Sweet
For co-parenting too, communication is the foundation. But here’s the catch—you don’t need to write letters; instead, keep it clear and direct whenever possible. Discuss your child’s drop-offs, their studies, homework, and doctor’s appointments, and avoid scratching around the past grievances.
In short, keep the conversations short yet sweet.
Stick to Your Routine
Whether it's a single household or a double, having a consistent routine applies for both.
From planning weekends to alternating holidays, create a schedule that your child can count on. This will not just help your kids but also avoid the back and forth between you and your ex about who has the child when.
Of course, this doesn’t mean your schedule has to be set in stone—after all, flexibility is the key.
Respect Each Other’s Parenting Style
While it’s rather difficult for you and your ex to agree on everything, respecting each other’s perspective is an essential aspect when it comes to co-parenting. You may be the extroverted, stay-up-late parent; your ex might be the ‘early to bed, early to rise’ parent.
In this case, a little variety in parenting styles won’t scare anything. The key to ensuring your child’s safety is to respect your ex’s parenting style and avoid undermining your ex-partner in front of your kid.
Walk Away From the Drama
Drama is that quicksand—the more you struggle, the deeper you sink. So the trick is to avoid unnecessary drama or rehashing the old arguments. If it’s your ex who’s baiting you for a fight, simply don’t take the hook.
Of course, you don’t have to suppress every concern, there’s a time and place for every discussion. So till you can, keep everything calm and cool.
Your Child Is Not Your Spy
Most parents use their kids as their secret spies. But the reality is they’re still kids, and their job is to be kids and not to act as the messenger between you and your ex.
It’s time to be a mature adult, and if you need to say anything, communicate directly. In fact, singing your child as a messenger will provoke unnecessary stress in them during conflicts.
And at this point, don’t question what’s going on at the other parent’s house. Let your child enjoy their time with both parents without feeling the burden of picking sides.
Take Care of Yourself Too
Co-parenting is not as easy as regular parenting—the truth is, it’s really exhausting. It needs both parties to show a lot of patience and a level of Zen.
In this hustle, don’t forget to take out time for your favorite hobby, preparing yourself some good breakfast, or relaxing yourself. It’s rather difficult to be the best version for your child if you are running on fumes.
Takeaway
Co-parenting is certainly difficult. However, when it comes to wanting the best for your kids, your journey to healthy co-parenting seems important. While nothing won’t come off easier, with an effective approach, your child will get the love you dream of giving them.